By The Numbers
The average adult human brain weighs three pounds, contains 150 billion neurons, has certain neural impulses that can travel as fast as 250 miles per hour, and generates sufficient wattage – between 10 and 23 watts – to power a light bulb. Those are some interesting figures that become rather amusing when juxtaposed against the image of a 250 pound man walking two miles per hour toward the six pounds of bacon cheeseburgers he’ll snatch from a pants-sagging cashier listening to a 140 pound rapper brag about the 22 bitches he’s banged while cruising atop 23 inch rims. I mean, when you’re wolfing down gargantuan bags of salty grease to the tune of twice the weight of your brain, that mind-boggling surplus of neurons begins to mean very little. If you relish in showcasing your ass via drooping your pants as part of a ‘gangsta’-oriented fashion statement, neural impulses traveling at 250 mph quickly lose their luster. And if you attempt to establish your credibility as a man by gloating over the plethora of whores you’ve supposedly bedded as a result of the shiny metal discs rotating between your tires, the fact that your brain could power a light bulb is at once a moot point. We carry atop our shoulders one of the greatest, least understood and unimaginably challenging mysteries facing mankind, yet the tremendous complexity of the human brain is so often superseded by how incredibly, hopelessly, laughably stupid we are as a people. It just doesn’t add up.