You Are A Pussy If:
If you are a male who has ever done the following, you are, by definition, a pussy:
1. Wiped a smudge off your smart phone’s screen while drinking a double caramel macchiato at Starbucks.
2. Secretly used your girlfriend’s papaya-scented body wash.
3. Blasted Madonna’s “Vogue” on your car stereo while everyone was out of earshot.
4. Ate a vegan breakfast sandwich with soy bacon and lightly spiced tofu scramble.
5. Complained to a waiter that the lettuce in your California Cobb salad lacked crispness.
6. Bought a woman flowers that you felt matched her personality.
7. Owned a Pier 1 Rewards card.
8. Carried a woman’s purse while she shopped for a new bra.
9. Attended the theatre to see “Les Miserables” on a blind date because you thought it might get you laid.
10. Stopped eating ham because you watched Charlotte’s Web.
11. At any point considered buying a Prius.
12. Participated in a Yogalates class.
13. Put an ad on an online dating site describing yourself as a morning person.
14. Gloated over how many friends you have on Facebook.
15. Told someone on a blog that you’d kick their ass in real life.
16. Whined about how bloated you felt after eating fettuccini Alfredo.
17. Named your fish after an anime character.
18. Became aroused while watching any anime character.
19. Drank organic beer.
20. Apologized to your girlfriend for blacking out and pissing the bed, causing your electric blanket to give her a minor shock.
Lol! I literally read someone gloating about how many Facebook friends they had within 45 seconds of reading this.
A sea of pussification.
You pegged me with #2 & #11, LOL!!
I guess I’m the biggest pussy of all time.
we are what we eat.
Then if what my girlfriend says is true – If I am, in fact, an asshole – then that says all sorts of weird things about me; lol.
Shut up! I KNOW you’ve done a hanful of those!
…Ps I JUST wiped a smudge off my screen whilst drinking a cheesecake martini…SELL!
I Hate Moisture Head.
My bf is guilty of number 1, 6, 8, 14, and 19. What does that say about me?
Some women love pussified (let’s say domesticated) men, or so they think.
“or so they think” – Interesting.
@ April: You like pussies and you’re quite controlling.
What about hentai?It’s anime and erotic.Watch Yakin Byoutou and tell me your not aroused.I’ll call you a liar.
Yes it’s you’re not your.You need an edit comment feature for drunk idiots who don’t proofread.My point still stands.
Lmfao! Hit a “sore” spot, did I?
Haha you got me.My trolling attempt has been squashed.I concede victory to you this one time.